MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Bring Him Home, Santa (Video and Lyrics)

This really pulls at my heart strings. I'm on of the Mommies with a little one asking for his Daddy for Christmas. Thank you Honey for sacrificing so much for our son and I. We love you more than you'll ever know. And thank you to all the soldiers missing their families this season, and Merry Christmas to the families missing their soldiers.

WHO IS KEGAN?

I've been thinking quite a bit lately, and I thought it was time to get some of my thoughts out. So here goes...

...This is MY life...

My name is Kegan & the word AMAZING doesn’t even begin to explain me and the life I live. First and foremost I’m a mother and a wife, and it’s the greatest roles I have ever played. My husband is a soldier in the United States army and I stand behind my man 100%. I’m truly a blessed woman to get to travel the world with such an astonishing person! The love of our lives was born June 22, 2006 and a day hasn’t gone by since then our little boy hasn’t amazed me. Nathyn Lee Douglas is our world!

Ask my closest friends and they’ll pretty much tell you I’m the life of the party! I’ve been lucky enough to have surrounded myself with the best of friends a girl could ask for. I have those friends that are always ready for a night on the town & hitting the dance floor, but would stop at the drop of a dime so that I can cry on their shoulder. The realest people in the world! I love you Melissa, Shana, Missy, Jason & Robert.

I do what I want… when I want. And I’ll do almost anything to get what I want. My husband spoils me and I love it. Don’t mistake it for being materialistic, I just like nice things. If I like you, you’ll know it. If I don’t like you, you’ll know it. I’m a softy at heart and will do what I can to cheer up a friend feeling blue. I’m never afraid to speak my mind; some call it bitchy-ness, but I prefer to call it honestly. Pretty much.. don’t ask me if your ass looks big in those jeans if you don’t want to know the truth.

I LOVE COOKING! I’m a huge fan of entertaining and take great pride in cooking dinner for a group of friends. Feel free to make a request, there isn’t anything I won’t try once!

MUSIC IS MY LIFE! If there isn’t a radio on, you’ll hear me singing anyways! I can never remember to make my bed but I know the words to a million songs, sometimes it amazes me. I listen to anything from Toby Keith to Lil Wayne, Justin Timberlake to Patsy Cline. I love it all. I’ve recently become a fan of karaoke but please don’t get me wrong, I’m no Mariah Carey and don’t claim to sing well, I just have a shitload of fun doing it!

PHOTGRAPHY IS MY PASSION! There’s something about capturing a moment in time that pulls at my heart. Each and every picture I’ve taken tells a story and I feel very fortunate to have captured every single one of them!

I HAVE A BUCKET LIST! I don’t expect the so-called “unattainable” such as fame and fortune, but there are many things I dream of doing before I “kick the bucket”. I will sky-dive, ride an elephant, kiss my husband under the Eiffel Tower, go on a cruise, adopt a child and much, much more. I will eventually have 100 things on my list, and I encourage everyone else to create one as well. It's never too early or too late to create a bucket list, so get started!

I’M ADDICTED TO QUOTES! I can spend hours online reading the words of some of the wisest people that have ever walked this earth and can always find a quote to fit any situation of my life! Probably my favorite so far: “When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on!”

I always have Lysol in my house, germs freak me out. Texting is my favorite; if you don’t have my number, ask for it! I’m addicted to bottled water, Crystal Geyser is the best (YES! Water does have a taste!). I love getting my hair done and changing it up as often as I can. A full tank of gas is one of the best feelings in the world! I still get butterflies when I check the mail and there is something addressed to “Mr. & Mrs. Terry Bolton”. I’m blessed to have named and be appointed the God Mother to a beautiful baby girl. I can’t say it enough, “Alivia Rene, you warm my heart”. That little girl is the strongest fighter I’ve ever and if her story doesn’t give you hope, nothing will. Douglas Patrick Butler was and always will be my hero and was by far the greatest man that ever lived! Rest in peace Grandpa, I miss you more today than I did yesterday… and only half as much as I will tomorrow. I love you.....

It took me a long time to find my silver lining but I’ve finally opened my eyes to the brighter things in life. I’m going somewhere, I’m loved, I have goals, and I surround myself with the greatest people alive. What more could I possibly need?

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

Typing to his Daddy! <3

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY?

A friend of mine, whom also blogs, does a weekly post titled "Wordless Wednesday" that includes nothing but a photo, sometimes a brief caption. Because I haven't been in the mood to blog much lately I figured I can at least make it a point to get a picture, maybe a few posted every Wednesday of new activities during the previous week. Enjoy!

MY BABY GIRL

She's back in the hospital, possibly experiencing heart failure. Breanna may be moving to Palo Alto to be closer to the hospital & Richard is already applying for jobs. Just keep Alivia in your prayers. :)

DOG PARK & A DAY WITH MY MOM

Today Nathyn and I picked up my mom (his Dammy) with all the doggies and went to the dog park! I got Charlie (my Yellow Lab) a Chuckit and we had TONS of fun throwing the balls for him over and over and over and...
After that we took the dogs home and went SHOPPING! We got some things like hats and gloves for when we finally make it to Germany, and I loaded up on goodies to send to my Hubby.

We're still waiting on paperwork for us to move to Germany. Until then Nathyn and I are trying to keep busy, busy, busy and spend time with loved ones before the big move! We recently discovered the dog park and I'm so disappointed we hadn't before! If you have dogs, take them! It's tons of fun playing with your dog out in the open, and watching them play with LOTS of other dogs, too! Hmm... maybe I'll go again this weekend...?

HORRIBLE ACTS OF VIOLENCE

Read the story here...

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Wow, I hope everyone had a WONDERFUL Halloween this year. This year my mom wanted to take Nathyn trick-or-treating, which was okay by me! I've never been a big fan of it myself, and I wasn't too fond of the idea of walking around in the dark without Terry. Anyways, the night before I took Nathyn to a haunted house! He loved it! He got spooked a few times, but in the end he wanted to go again! I wasn't able to get pictures, but my mom did snap a few of him out trick-or-treating.While Nathyn was out getting candy with his Grandma I decided to go out with some friends! I actually dressed up too, a first for a loooong time. At first I wanted to be Madea but I honestly decided about 3-4 hours before I went out, so this is the best I could come up with!

Me and my friend Patricia (whom I've affectionately nicknamed P.A.) Friends going on 10 YEARS!

So, the night turned out to be a BLAST! Halloween was fun this year, and hopefully next year we'll get to spend it with Terry. I was sad he didn't get to hear Nathyn run around saying "tick-er-tweet"! It was sooo cute!

HALLOWEEN SNEAK PEAK

FLYING SOLO... AGAIN!

Terry left to head out to Germany yesterday. He's actually in St. Louis, Missouri right now and will be until Sunday, then he goes to Germany. I was actually surprisingly easy to send him off, partly because I know I'll be okay while he's gone and partly because I know it won't be too long before I see him again!

I contacted the housing division on the base in Germany he's going to and he informed me that the waiting list for Terry's rank and family size is only about 3 weeks, so we should get the word to head on over as soon as Terry goes into the housing office and gets on the list. I'm so thankful it isn't too long, I'm tired of waiting for this move. I'm ready to roll already!

I am kinda freaking out though. While Terry was home we called Travis AFB a few times to get some information on having them move us. We were never able to get and good answers out of them so I decided to just go shopping for answers on my own. Now I'm frustrated because I have to seperate my unaccompanied baggage from my household goods, and make sure that I don't go over my weight limit. Not that big of a deal, except I'm doing it on my own, and I only have 3 weeks to do it. Most of my stuff is in storage, so we'll just be leaving behind what we can't take in the storage and paying it monthly.

Anyways, that's about it for now. I'll know better about when we're leaving when Terry actually gets into the housing office, which probably won't be until Tuesday. Oh, how I hope times flies!

OUR VISIT TO ALIVIA

Terry and I were able to go down to Palo Alto for a few days to visit our God Daughter and lend some support to Breanna and Richard. It was definitely an emotional trip, but we were glad we were there either way. This is how Alivia was when we first got there.

At this point she was in an "isolation" room and she had a breathing tube because her lungs weren't strong enough to breath on their own. Because of that she also had a feeding tube in her nose for formula. The colorful things wrapped around her arms are called "no-nos". These are for just in case she wakes up she can't bend her arms to pull tubes out. She was on melrinone for her heart, zantac for her tummy, a medication to keep her sleeping and fentanyl for pain. Very rarely did she move, and if she opened her eyes, it was only for a second.

On day two of our visit Alivia got a little stronger and was able to move out of isolation. The doctors started weaning her off of the IV milrinone and onto an oral medication for her heart, one she can be sent home with once she is strong enough. They were also slowly lowering the amount of oxygen going through her breathing tube so that she would start breathing a little more on her own. Alivia started opening her eyes for short periods of time and looking around, but still, she mostly slept. October 15th, 2009, Terry and I got to be a part of baptising little Alivia. We had planned on it since she was born, but it was important to Breanna that both Terry and I be there. Since Terry left the day after she was born, and is leaving again this Friday we decided to have it done right there in the hospital. First, I was appointed to get her dressed.

During the ceremony, her parents and godparents got the chance to each give Alivia their own blessing.

Alivia and her parents, Richard and Breanna.

It was amazing that she stayed awake for the whole baptism. It was the first time she was actually awake and looking aroud since she entered the hospital more than one week before.

On Friday we had to come home to our own baby (Nathyn) but we went to see Alivia one more time before taking off. When we got to the hospital we were surprised to Alivia with NO breathing tube! She was finally breathing on her own! However, there was also another surprise... She was now cross-eyed. At first we were all very concerned and feared some brain damage because of lack of oxygen, we thought maybe they took the breathing tube too soon. Her doctor informed us though that there was no brain damage and that Alivia was going through withdrawls from being removed from the fentanyl, the pain medication she was on for 10 days. They took her off because she no longer had the breathing tube so they thought she didn't need it anymore. This was Alivia on Friday.Time to say goodbye, Alivia had a little something to say to her God Dad. Terry was sad that he still has not been able to hold his god daughter (he was nervous to the day he was born, he'd been swimming in the river prior to seeing her). We're hoping that Alivia gets stronger so that her and Breanna are able to visit us in Germany! If not, we will definitely see her on one of our trips home for vacation! WE LOVE YOU ALIVIA!

I have talked to Breanna every day, morning, noon and night since we left. She's doing MUCH better! Breanna says she awake for long periods of time, she plays with her toys in her crib, and smiles and laughs often. Her eyes have even went back to normal! Breanna has been able to put her little hairs in pig tails and even has been able to hold her and feed her. I'm hoping that I will get to see her one more time before leaving to Germany, I miss her so much already! Alivia is one strong little girl, and I know she'll continue to do great! I can't wait to see what she does next! Here's Alivia TODAY!

PRAYER REQUEST

Click on the image to enlarge... Feel free to save (after enlarging) and repost. We can use all the prayer we can get. Thank you all for your support.

ALIVIA IS HAVING A HEART BIOPSY TODAY

So both Alivia (by life flight) and Breanna & Richard (by car) made it to Stanford Hospital in Palo Alto, CA safely. They spent a little time getting Alivia all situated and stable again and will mostly just monitor her over the next three days. Early morning they informed Bre that they will be doing a biopsy on her heart by making an insicion in her leg and running an instrument up to her heart to remove a small peice. Removing it won't affect her heart at all, and they can use it for testing to see if they can get any more answers.

They haven't yet but it's possible that they are going to put her on a machine that will pump her heart for her so her tiny body doesn't have to work so hard. They did put her on a different type of ventilator though, I'm not sure exactly what.

As of right now she is very stable on the medications they have her on. They went over some options. If what she's on now doesn't continue to help her they have one more medication they can try. If that too fails, then she will for sure need the heart transplant.

It's literally heartbreaking to me that I can't be there with her. Terry and I are waiting to hear back from Breanna on her accomedations to see if it's possible that we stay with her. If we can, Terry and I will be driving down to Palo Alto this weekend. If that's not an option, then we'll have to wait until our payday on the 15th, and we'll drive up then and stay in a hotel for a couple days.

Please continue to pray for Alivia and her family. Forward this, re-post it, pass it on to friends and family. Breanna is asking for as much love and support as she can get right now for Little Alivia.

MY GOD DAUGHTER NEEDS YOUR PRAYERS!

Holding on to Mommy's hand.. Little Alivia needs all the love and prayers she can get during this most horrible time in her life.

Alivia has been sick a couple weeks now but when she stopped breathing for seconds at a time, Breanna decided it was time for yet another trip to the Emergency Room. When she went to the hospital last night the doctors found that her heart is enlarged. Today Alivia was life flighted to a hospital in Palo Alto, CA where she will get more testing done to determine the cause of the enlargement. At this point they are thinking it is the result of one of two things; either a virus that attacked her heart, or it could be congenital.

If the enlarging is caused from a virus, Alivia will be treated and sent home as soon as she is better, it could be a few days, it could be a few weeks. However, if it is determined to be congenital, little Alivia will need a heart transplant. We won't know which it is until she gets more testing done at the new hospital and the doctors are able to make their call.
I will be updating as often as I can as I get more information.

She is being very closely monitored and has a nurse by her side at all times to make sure she isn't waking up and to monitor her heart rate and breathing.

Her little body is full of lots of medications. She is on a medication that will hopefully reverse the enlarging of her heart. She's also on a pain med for obvious reasons. The have her on something to help her sleep, and on something to keep her paralyzed so that if she does wake up so won't be able to move around too much as it could be bad for her little heart which is already working far too hard.

PLEASE keep Breanna, Alivia and Richard in your prayers.

SURPRISE VISITORS

Today we got a surprise visit from my sister, Kia and my nephew Rhyden. I hadn't seen him in about a month and boy has he grown in the mean time. He is definitely a Momma's Boy and was a little leary of Terry and I when he first got here, but he quickly warmed up and we had a great visit. I LOVE when babies come to visit, it makes for such a great photo opportunity! Here's the memories we made today!

Rhyden liked to play peek-a-boo!

There he is! He did this for like 15 minutes! :)

He isn't used to big dogs! He LOVED Charlie, my gentle giant!

My neice Shelby stopped by for some baby time too! He just adored her and gave her nothing but but ol' gummy smiles!

Kisses for Momma...

...and some for Uncle, too! But none for Auntie, I wasn't feeling too well so I didn't hold him too much.

All snuggled up and ready for the long ride home! We had a great time with baby and Kia today! Come see us again soon!

PUMPKIN PATCH 2009

Every year since Nathyn was born we've taken him to Bishop's Pumpkin Farm in Wheatland, CA. We went with Mariah & the kids from the Daycare I was working at this year and we really had lots of fun! It was only 4 days after my surgery though so our trip did not last long, as it didn't take long for me to really start feeling the pain again. Terry and I decided we're going to take Nathyn again in a week or two so that we can do all the fun things he likes that we missed out on this year like the train ride, playing in the old barn and hanging out in the old railroad car. Here's some pics, enjoy!Daddy & Nathyn on the tractor pulled hayride.

Terry was scared the goat was gonna pee on him! It was too funny!

I will post more pictures after our next trip, including some comparison pics from last year so we can see how much Nathyn has changed and grown over this last year.

A WHOLE LOAD OF ADORABLE!

MY SURGERY

I had my surgery on Monday, two days after Terry got home! I know right, poor Honey finally comes home, just to take care of me! :) He says he doesn't mind though, and I'm glad I got to have him home for it!

Anyways, in case you missed it, I found out about 2 weeks ago that I had a large cyst on my right ovary. By large, I mean about as big as my whole uterus (7.8 cm in diameter). I had been having lots of cramping for over two years, but my regular doctor overlooked it, so I thought I should too. The pain was getting worse though, so I went to a differnt doctor (my OB/GYN when I was pregnant with Nathyn) and they were very helpful in finding out the problem and getting it fixed! They said that I had to have the cyst removed, and that most likely I'd lose my ovary too.

I got to the Sugery Center about noon, checked in, filled out some paper work and then went back to the pre-op room. I changed into my gown and then answered about 100 questions about my health and medical record. The anesthesiologist came and talked to me about putting my to sleep, and hooked me up with a "cocktail" so that I wouldn't be nauseas (I throw up from anesthesea, even local types like when I had my c-setion). It worked though!

I went back into the operating room and laid on the table and was OUT before I knew it! Next thing I remember was waking up in the post-op area. The nurses told me that everything went well, but that there were a few surprises while they were in there.

Surprise #1: The cyst was NOT on the right side, it was on the left. It just moved around behind my uterus so it looked like it was the right side.
Surprise #2: The cyst was NOT on my ovary! It was on my fallopian tube! This is good though because they were able to removed the cyst and SAVE my ovary! :)
Surprise #3: They definitely found what was causing the pain! The cyst moved around so much that it actually twisted my fallopian tube completely around several times and tied it into knots. They were able to fix that too though.

So the surgery turned out great! They even gave me like 12 pictures of my ovary, uterus, cyst and my fallopian tubes all ties in knots! I was gonna post them but decided against it for those of you who easily get the heeby geebies! If you want to see them, I can email them, just leave your email address. As for me, I'm doing fine. I'm pretty tender, my throat hurts from the breathing tube, and moving around hurts some, but I'm trying to get up and around as best I can. I'm also super groggy and sleepy, so I'm just trying to get my rest. I was told NO lifting, NO bending over, and NO activity that causes any pain until after my post-op appointment on Tuesday. I will update after I go to my appointment.

TERRY'S GRADUATION! <3

Hooray! I went and got my Honey! We left EARLY in the morning on Wednesday, September 23. It was an ALL day trip; 2 plane rides, and a 2 hour drive. We got to our hotel room around 8pm after having dinner at Imo's Pizza (if you ever go to St. Louis, MO you HAVE to have pizza here!). The next morning we got up, had a delicous breakfast at the Cracker Barrel before driving the 20 minutes to Ft. Leonard Wood for the Family Day Briefing where we learned the does and don'ts of what Terry was allowed to do when we took him off base.

As soon as we got off base Terry's dad asked him what he wanted to have for lunch and Terry said "A LOT!". So we went to Ryan's Grill & Buffet and Terry surely did eat A LOT, and FAST! After that we went back to the hotel for a little bit, had dinner at Miller's Grill and just hung out until it was time to take Terry back to the barricks until Graduation on Friday.

After Terry went back to the Barricks Thursday night, me and his mom had lots of fun snooping in his bags that he left with us at the hotel! He didn't mind once he saw the pictures. Friday morning we went back to Ft. Leonard Wood for the graduation! It was such a cool experience, and I really wish that my camera could have gotten some better pictures in the auditorium but it was pretty dark in there. The whole ceremony lasted about an hour and a half and afterwards all the soldiers marched outside, then we followed to find them. After that, Terry was a FREE MAN (for now at least!). We didn't really do much but hang out, eat, and go swimming in the hotel pool.
Then we left at 4am Saturday morning to start our LOOONG trip home! It's SO nice to have my Husband home again! The day before Family Day, Terry went to an overseas briefing which brought both good and bad news. GOOD NEWS is that Terry will be here in Sacramento until October 25th! He got approved to do the HRAP (hometown recruiting assistant program). He works at the recruiting office a few hours a day for the first two weeks, then his second two weeks he has his leave. Nathyn and I don't get to go with him because he has to get housing first. Hopefully it doesn't take too long, but I'm guessing I'll be here at least through Thanksgiving. HOORAY for time with family and friends. BOO for having to be without Terry again. BUT, I'm stronger now, and I know it'll be okay!